What Should We Really Be Teaching Our Children?

I can remember growing up feeling so betrayed, angry, alone and defeated when the reality of real-life started pounding me to the ground. Little did I know that the most important thing that I needed then, now and for the rest of my life, was planted as a seed nurtured throughout my life, and I would need to reap the benefits of a seed sowed out of love by my parents. I was at rock bottom when it occurred to me that life at home and living in the real world were complete opposites. My back was against the wall with limited options. I could give up crawl home to my parents never to reach my full potential. I could also unlearn many of the behaviour patterns that were passed down to me because of how I was socialized, leading to how I interpreted the world around me, or most importantly relying on my faith in a God that at the time I needed Him the most seemed silent. As I struggled and pondered my options, I came to the conclusion that I was never one to quit and decided to use the principles that I learned at home to venture out into the cold dark world believing that flashes of hope would occasionally brighten my hopelessness as I learned to cope in the real world. 

Do not get me wrong, my parents cared for us, provided for us, loved us beyond measure, taught us to look for the best in everyone, comforted us, and met all our needs. I learned the hard way that my Christian beliefs and my way of life labelled me as a loving and caring person and thought they did not equip me with the aggression I believed was needed to navigate an often cold and insensitive world. During my season of unanswered questions, there came a time when things drastically changed for our family, and the comforts I was accustomed to were no more. It was a dark time that I thought would never end, but my parents were people of strong faith in God and experienced life before when they had no choice but to look to God and taught me to do the same. That is why I believe the most important lesson we can teach our children to live a purposeful life is to have a relationship with God. 

As far back as my childhood memory will allow, I can remember praying with my parents, grandparents, going to church, sleeping in church, waking up early on Saturday and Sunday mornings to pray. When I became aware of the love my family had for God, I started observing my parents praying singing crying out to God. It made little sense to me because of all the chaos we were experiencing as a family and God seemed so silent, but they prayed and worshipped Him like their lives depended on it. I can remember going to church on Sundays seeing my sisters, mother, other family members getting all emotional tears streaming down my father’s face as he played his piano, but I would feel nothing. I was mostly annoyed by their behaviour because of what was unfolding in our lives.

I wondered if God loved me because I could never feel Him. The misconceptions I had were many, and I thought that I was never one of His chosen because if that were the case, I would be feeling Him like everyone else in my family. Also, a loving father would not allow my life to change so drastically removing me from my comfort zone with no warning. During my time of wondering if God was real and if He loved me, my interpretation of Revelation 3:20 was thwarted. I believed it stated, “If anyone went knocking at God’s door, they would not be turned away.” The bible verse states, “Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.” (Revelation 3:20) but because of my misconception, I figured this was my chance of making it into heaven. I was going to seek God, and if He were real, then He would see me desperately knocking and would not be able to turn me away. For two weeks I prayed, sang and fasted most importantly from a sincere heart and took my talking to God seriously based on all the behaviours I saw my parents displaying over the years, and He did show up for me. Again this is my experience and I am not saying this is a blueprint to building a relationship with God. God because of His never-ending mercy and grace showed up for me. This is my experience with my God, it has changed my life and I will love and cherish the day God showed up for me.

It was a Sunday morning and I was home singing songs I had listened to consistently for two weeks. I decided to stay home alone while my family went off to church. I was enjoying my alone time just worshipping and was finding pleasure in it. I was cleaning the house and I got to the entrance of our porch when I stepped out I dropped the mop and was immediately down on my knees. There was a strong and unbearable love that was so overwhelming I had no choice but to buckle. I stayed on the floor just weeping because I knew that the loving God that I was told about over the years showed up for me and showered me with love. At that moment, I felt what my Heavenly Fathers’ heart was like towards me. The love I felt that day was supernatural; it was the definition of love, a love so great that my only response was to cry. I felt an incomprehensible love that changed my life forever. Since that day, I never questioned why my parents took their relationship with God so seriously. I admired them and was so grateful that they taught me that a relationship with God is of utmost importance in life.

Having a relationship with God and understanding what He did for me, how He feels about me is the only thing that is common to all seasons of my life. My degree, my friends, where I work, who I know, who my relatives are, where I live, race and the aggression I believed I needed could never help with the emotional scars that were deep in my soul. God was and is the only one that can walk me through the darkest corners of life even when there is a smile on my face, and my soul is as dark as midnight. I know what having a relationship with God has done for me and continues to do. I am now a mother of three children and if I manage to educate them about God, I will count it as accomplishing my role as a parent. When I became a parent, my mind was focused on continually telling my son “You need to go to school and focus”. “An education is what you need to survive in the future.” “The world is more competitive now and you need to push.” I became so obsessed with what success looks like based on the world’s standards.

As parents, we spend most of our time preparing our children to live here on Earth and we are unaware of what is ahead. The bible says that we are like flowers of the field. We are all passing through on Earth we cannot stay here. What can we take when we are leaving Earth? Can we take a degree can our friends and loved ones walk us into life after death? Does our family and race matter when we cross over? If as humans, we had the answers to these questions, we would not cry so much when someone we love passes away. Why not then give our children hope for the future? Hope that a loving God that sent His son to die for us, raised Him from the dead and now He is preparing a place for us and when this life ends He will be waiting for us?

Yes, I will support my children in getting an education. Yes, they need an education to support themselves here on Earth but my most important duty is to help my children to understand that they were created by a loving father that sent His son on a rescue mission to save them. They will know He desires a relationship with them, that He wants them to become like Him, and the Bible is our guide. They will understand that life is full of pleasure, pain, hurt and no matter what season they are in the Lord is with them. He says in His unchanging word I am the friend that sticks closer than a brother. They will know eternity is not spent here on Earth and that there is a life after this one. How do we prepare our children for eternity? Teach them about God let them know how vital a relationship with God is.